Disappointments are part of daily life. Sometimes we lose something that is precious or hurt someone we love. Worse still sometimes someone we love lets us down and we feel hurt. In response, we can begin to feel angry and resentful. In our imagination we can magnify the disappointment and hurt feelings making it really significant until it is dominating our entire life view that impacts on every aspect of our day. This leads to more anger and rage inside and we lose our happiness – as everything feels wrong in our world view. We push people away and very often do not allow the very significant loved one to come back to us and make up with an explanation or apology.
Let it go... Take a moment to breathe. Be in the moment.
If you have hurt a friend or someone you love, talk to them and make amends as best you can. Be honest and don’t avoid the issue. Listen to them and allow them to share with you everything they need to – uninterrupted. Then let them know how you are feeling… Don’t try and justify your actions. Be sincere. Sometimes a card or a gift helps us to start the conversation, or even just a email.
If you have been hurt by someone you trusted and love then let then know how their actions have made you feel. Be prepared to listen. Often the other person involved is feeling just as bad as you are feeling. Remind yourself of your love and friendship and what it means to you. You might like to make contact. It is always best to wait until you are no longer full of emotion, whether it be anger fear or sadness.
Setting boundaries with loved ones is something we often do not think about . Talking though the issues is a really opportune time to make clear respectful boundaries – what is ok and what is not ok.
Friendship is a precious gift and is something not to be taken for granted.
Don’t let pride and emotions and exaggerated thoughts destroy relationships with loved ones